All Night Rager... aka Cream Tea In Bed

Guess what dudes!
It's ROYAL WEDDING TIME.

AKA time for a new post!

Let's make it short so I can get back to ugly hat watching...

First off: David Beckham was the first attractive person to arrive - but he was not the first person to arrive...

B. Victoria, still afraid to smile and reveal busted teeth

C. Chelsea Davy. REALLY HARRY? REALLY? She is no Kate. Oh well, get it out of your system.

D. Live blogging at @ladolcetati

E. I baked fresh cranberry orange scones with meyer lemon poppy seed glaze and topped them with some Sussex cream (I used to live in Brighton, so I only use Sussex Cream. Devon can kiss my ass). I also whipped up some chocolate fudge and am putting off my PG Tips until actual morning so I can get some sleep.

F. The next time someone says "Americans are uncivilized," I would like to replay footage of the English crowd going bananas because a soccer star showed up at a big wedding. Ok?

G. Can't wait for the dress... yet, I don't wish I was her. As I bleached my hair and threw my Manic Panic Vampire Red on one more time, I realized rock 'n' roll royalty is the only kind meant for me. However, I love the English pomp and circumstance with abandon. America just doesn't have the same history.

H. Watching the Royal Wedding from Los Angeles takes commitment, the time zone change is brutal. This is like World Cup all over again... but with WAY LESS ANXIETY. (I'm half Brazilian, do the math.)

K back to live blogging on Twitter. Ridiculous, I know. It's 3 am what do you expect.

-TS